This month, I’m celebrating Tom’s birthday and wanted to dedicate a blog post about how I knew Tom was the one. He’s the most supportive and loving husband a woman could ever ask for. From the end of March, I start thinking of all of the things I could give him, but ultimately wishing that he could always be happy is the biggest and most intangible gift I could hope for him.
Prior to meeting Tom, I had been in a really long relationship that ended and spent 3 years enjoying single hood. I needed that time to find who I was and what it took to be in the right place, and mind set, to be in a healthy relationship that would last. Before I was ready to get into another relationship I remember asking successfully married couples how they knew they’d met the one. The answer I often received was, “When you meet him, you know.” Or, “When you know, you know.” This kind of response never seemed enough for me, and I didn’t really understand until I let Tom into my heart. While those phrases above are true, I wanted to provide answers that were more tangible than those that were offered to me.
For me, it also took being in a wrong relationship to see what was right. There were numerous reasons why I fell for my husband, and many traits that made us get along so well. I was hesitant to leave some of my independence behind, compromise my gym schedule and the evenings where I wanted to be out socializing, but with Tom I didn’t have to. After just a few dates getting to know him I knew I would quickly fall for him. What was initially good turned into something special and amazing.
Below is a List of How I Knew I Met the One (When I Finally Let the Relationship Happen)
1) You both share the same core values (how you treat others, family values, religion, etc.) If any of these are very important to you, having similar values can be a huge factor in choosing someone who understands you on a whole different level.
2) He/She loves you as you are and doesn’t try to change you (and vise versa). You wouldn’t want someone to change who you are, so you have to be happy with the kind of person you are with as they are now.
3) Being with him/her person brings out the best in you and makes you want to be a better person. That person feels the same about you.
4) He/She makes you laugh all of the time. Laughter and happiness is what we all want out of life, isn’t it?
5) This person complements your lifestyle. Compromising is a part of every relationship, but he/she just adds to the great things you already have going for you, not take away from it. Neither should this person prevent you from doing the things you love or enjoy.
6) You were both already in a place in life where you were both happy and confident with who you are as individuals. This allowed you to really add to each other’s happiness – not rely on it.
7) You trust this person and he/she trusts you, so there’s no arguing about jealousy. Ultimately, if you have your own issues to work out, it’s good to recognize them. When you are happy with who you are and meet the right one, you can focus on building a great relationship.
8) You respect him/her and he/she shows you the same respect.
9) You don’t argue about the little insignificant things.
10) You want to make an effort to communicate when things are not going well, or as planned.
11) You want to see him/her happy all of the time and he/she wants the same for you.
12) He/She holds you when you’re sad and is there when it counts.
13) He/She tells you he/she loves you even when you’re upset or angry with each other.
14) You always think of yourself as a team, so hurting one another is a lose-lose situation.
15) You’re both supportive of the things that are important to one another.
16) You want similar things out of life and down the road when you get old. (If you want to travel the world later, settle with kids/grand kids, move to another city, live near or with parents, etc).
17) You feel or show appreciation & so does your partner.
These are the top things that come to mind, but there are so many more reasons why you could be with the right person. I feel very blessed to have found the one for me and I hope that everyone gets to share their life with someone special.
This post is dedicated to my one and only, Rise Again BJJ. Without you babe, my life would be incomplete.
For this shoot, I wore a structured pink cocktail dress by SheIn, which was perfect for this celebratory weekend. I can’t even believe it’s being sold for under $25. See below for the direct link.
If you enjoyed this post and have your own additions to add to the list, I’d love to hear!
Thank you SheIn for sponsoring this post.